Hold Them Close

I am so glad God knows exactly what we can handle. I'm so glad that He is in control and I'm not. Because I certainly don't think I would have been able to handle what we've gone through the past few days on my own. We thought Leah was getting better after that initial doctor visit, but Sunday she developed a high fever and another hard, red boil close to the other one on her bottom. I took her back to the doctor on Monday (kicking & screaming all the way, I might add) and sure enough, it had spread. The culture he'd taken came back as an infection called MRSA. I recognized that name and realized that there are many people that have died as a result of this infection. It is so resistant to treatment and so difficult to kill. So Monday the dr. cut the second boil and drained it like he'd done the first. He prescribed a second antibiotic and said he was almost positive that he'd gotten it all, but if he hadn't, the rest was out of his control and she would have to be hospitalized.

So yesterday it didn't seem like she was improving and we thought we saw yet another hard, red spot. We immediately began running worst-case scenarios in our mind. Brett and I were both completely prepared for the doctor to send us straight to the hospital today after her follow-up. Neither of us slept or ate much yesterday or this morning (I literally felt "worried sick"). Leah was actually acting as if nothing was wrong-- she was up in her room nearly an hour after we put her to bed, reading her books and talking to herself as she always does. She was her usual self all morning today, getting into all sorts of mischief (and I admit, we let her get away with a lot we wouldn't have normally let her get away with!). And I kept looking at her thinking, what if she were gone tomorrow? What if something serious was to happen with her? In just the two short years I've known her, I've developed a love for her that cannot ever be replaced-- she is almost a part of me.


We went back today and the doctor said everything looked perfectly fine. He simply cleaned the existing wound and told us it's okay to let it scab over and heal. She'll still have to take her antibiotics for the next week or so, along with warm baths (both of which leave her kicking & screaming & crying every single time), and next week she'll take baths with bleach. But she doesn't have to have any further treatment.

Our kids are not our own-- they are granted to us only for a short time. Though at times they do things that drive me crazy, though there are times when I want them to just give me a minute's peace, though there are times when I wish they would just hurry up and grow up... I can't imagine what my life would be like without either of these blessings God has given me. I am so grateful that He has spared us this time, and from now on I will think twice about how I spend my time. I will cuddle with them just a little longer (even if it means I have to watch Strawberry Shortcake for the 600th time), I will kiss them one more time (even if they are crying or whining or screaming about something or other), I will get down on the floor and play with their toys with them (even if it means the laundry goes undone), and I will never, ever take for granted that they are here with me. How special this Christmas will be!